I’m having one of THOSE days — you know, the ones where you feel like the worst parent on the planet? Yes, I’ve snipped, I’ve snapped, and I’ve dared anyone to try and cross my path. I’ve got a major NyQuil hangover, not to mention a dog who is psychotically obsessed with my ass. I’ve nursed everyone else but myself back to health for three freaking weeks, and quite frankly, I’m sick and tired of it. My last bit of patience has hit the road Jack. So, when my son tried to play me this morning into thinking he should stay home from school once again, I wasn’t having it. I made him suck it up and strap on his backpack. I listened to him grumble all the way to school, but I marched his little ass right through the front doors, all the while feeling a tiny pit of guilt in my stomach about whether or not I was doing the right thing. Even though I just took him to the doctor for the bazillionth effing time last night for an ear check, maybe he really was coming down with something….
And as I was fighting this internal battle within myself, I was punched right in the face with yet another parental failure on my part. I completely forgot to help my kids make a damn leprechaun trap for their first grade classrooms.
SON. OF. A. BITCH.
I watched all these happy, smiling mothers carrying these ornately decorated boxes into their kids’ classrooms, and I wanted to just slam my head into one of the itty bitty lockers in the hall. Shit! Could I seriously suck any more? The teachers reassured me that my kids could bring their boxes in tomorrow, and that maybe some leprechauns could sneak into the classrooms during lunch to leave some “gold” behind. But, damn, how could I forget that? I’m a stay at home mom — isn’t it my job to know these friggin’ things?
So, yes, I’m beating myself up today, and yes I’m in a bitchy mood. I cannot keep everything straight, and I’m clearly far from perfect. If I see one of those “know it all moms” today, I swear I may just run her over with my car. I am human, and I screw up sometimes, so you can either sue me or join me in my pity party.