Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Judging from Beyonce, Manti T’eo, and Lance Armstrong, fake things apparently happen in threes.

** The media sure knows how to beat a news story to death.

** My ass is eternally grateful for the genius who invented seat heaters.

** Women supposedly look their ugliest at 3:30 PM on Wednesdays.

** The people who conducted that survey obviously never saw me at 8:00 AM on a Saturday.

** 5 Hour Energy is just a fancy name for speed.

** Like gravity, my memory continues to fail me.

** Asparagus = yes!  Asparagus pee = not so much.

** It is just downright CRUEL to sell Girl Scout cookies in January when people are trying to stick to a resolution!

** The costs of summer camp are gonna drive me to the poor house.  Or to prostitution.

** I  really wish I had more time to waste.

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.

<< SO WHAT DID YOU LEARN THIS WEEK???? >>

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2 Responses to Things I’ve Learned This Week

  1. David says:

    Don’t offer a homeless man hot coffee and a sausage biscuit when it’s 20 degrees out. He will turn it down and ask for money, or sugar for his coffee. I drove off and had a warm biscuit and hot coffee.

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