Tag Archives: dog

Things I’ve Learned This Week

** This time of the year makes me so very grateful for my beloved hot glue gun. ** I may steal the dog crate from the dog — it just looks so darn PRIVATE in there. ** Judging by his wardrobe choices, … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** I am totally addicted to selling crap on virtual garage sale sites. ** Finding a CLEAN gas station bathroom is like finding a unicorn. ** Carpool duty should be immediately followed by wine. ** Eating with a jock cup … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** The first day of school is a blessing like no other. ** Homework’s about to unleash its evil wrath upon us very, very soon. ** I’d be much better equipped to run this three-ring circus if I had a whip. … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** I’m being stalked by a grasshopper. ** Amusement parks are where manners go to die and germs go to thrive. ** Sleeping with the windows open is awesome.  Unless your neighbor’s dog sounds like a dying coyote. ** ”Not Dishwasher … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Goatdog likes wine, which makes total sense since he is my dog. ** If it’s not written down, it’s not getting done. ** It’s obviously some kind of rule that kid puke must be projectile and occur at an … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Jet lag is not really the vacation souvenir I had in mind. ** Even the eyes in the back of my head have bags underneath them. ** Just because there’s a bandwagon does not mean you have to jump … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Winter is officially “over” — and I’ll believe it when I see it. ** The Tooth Fairy’s gonna have to start leaving IOU’s if my twins don’t go to bed earlier at night. ** Just because you have a … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** I’m not good at getting lucky. ** Child labor is more expensive than it used to be. ** A little piece of me dies every time people “REPLY ALL” to a group email. ** I could buy my kids 10,000 … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** If I looked like David Beckham, I’d be naked ALL the time. ** I’m a firm Belieber that Justin needs a big ol’ time out. ** Scooping dog turds in the frigid air should earn one a reward of … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Trying to get my kids to organize their rooms is like trying to get a dog to scoop his own poop. ** I wish somebody would jump to make me dinner whenever I say I’m hungry. ** Every time I go … Continue reading

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