Things I’ve Learned This Week

** This household is a little too obsessed with man parts.

** Starbucks is calling their new XXL size a “Trenta” cause “big ass cup” would’ve been too easy.

** The American Girl store has completely brainwashed my daughter.

** Groupon has completely brainwashed my husband.

** The stench of ass is most certainly NOT want you want your fridge to smell like.

** If you build it, they will come………..and wreck it.

** The monkeys are gonna start flinging poo at me any day now.

** It’s all fun and games till the dog eats your allowance.

** The laundry is like the magazines I never have time to read — it all just piles up.

** Sometimes you just need a good ol’ PB&J.

** Frozen nipples are not a whole lot of fun.

** Advil PM should be named Advil All Freaking Day.  Holy hangover!

** My eggs are never over-easy.

** The family truckster stays clean for about 1.5 seconds after a car wash.

** My to-do list is multiplying like the damn Duggar family.

** There are a shit ton of things that make me go hmmm.

** You can never ever hug your kids too much.

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.

<< SO WHAT DID YOU LEARN THIS WEEK???? >>

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5 Responses to Things I’ve Learned This Week

  1. I learned that I do not want to eat dinner at your house unless you can guarantee it came from take-out! Seriously ass, dam I’m afraid to ask what you found in there!

    Megan

  2. ang says:

    i learned that seriously there are not so smart people out there

  3. I learned that I am pained by looking at your Bears pic, since I am a mourning fan this am.

  4. Reid Adair says:

    I learned that your dog apparently eats anything – and everything. Good grief!

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