Things I’ve Learned This Week (Back from the Dead!!!)

So after a LOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG hiatus from writing over the summer (life sure gets in the way, doesn’t it?!), I’ve decided to crank out a much overdue list of things I’ve learned this week.  Drumroll, please…………………………..

i-used-to-be-able-to-pull-allnighters-but-now-i-can-barely-pull-alldayers-S5K

** Whatever I like, my preteen daughter will inevitably NOT like.

** If you clean it, they will destroy it.

** A mental picture is often more memorable than a selfie.

** Our orthodontist bill is almost as big as Donald Trump’s ego.

** I’m not sure who thinks 7th grade math is harder — my kids or me.

** People who sound like their tongues are glued to the roof of their mouths should probably not become customer service reps.

** The start of the school year just wouldn’t be complete without a case of head lice in someone’s classroom.

** And now my head itches just thinking about it.  (And yours probably does, too, right?)

** “Sold out” are two of the cruelest words in the English language.

** There are many people I’d like to introduce to a little friend of mine called DEODORANT.

** Evidently, I’m not above going out in public in my pajamas.

** People who are super anal must be severely constipated.

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.

<< SO WHAT DID YOU LEARN THIS WEEK???? >>

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2 Responses to Things I’ve Learned This Week (Back from the Dead!!!)

  1. First, welcome back!

    - I dress my five year old daughter while she’s still asleep . . . I’m ALWAYS prepared that, if she actually wakes during the act of my dressing her, she’ll declare the outfit I’ve decided upon as “unworthy.”

    - I’ve stopped cleaning most everything. Everywhere.

    - I’m deathly afraid of homework as the kids progress in school. I was always the kid who “just got it” with math & science . . . if my kids don’t, well, I’m not sure how to help teach something where I don’t necessarily understand the details of the process.

    - Stupid formication

    - My life has been *just crazy* enough that there are mornings that I don’t manage a shower before I get out of the door. I feel sorry for any/all in my path those days.

    - I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve caught myself taking out the trash in nothing but my underwear. Pajamas can be downright “dressy” for me.

  2. APRIL says:

    Welcome Back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Sure did miss you!!

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