** I’m not buying whatever Mother Nature is selling.
** My transformation from human to crocodile is nearly complete, thanks to all the dry heat in my house.
** Suddenly a Snuggie doesn’t seem like such a dumb idea.
** You know it’s cold outside when your family room feels like an igloo.
** Having to plan your kids’ summer schedules when it’s a freaking snow globe outside is just whackadoo.
** It’d be awesome if the ornaments were as fun to take off the tree as they are to put on the tree.
** Frozen snot is not sexy.
** No matter the question, sugar cookies are always the answer.
** Paying your children to do the chores you loathe is worth every single penny.
** Thank you very much Cialis commercials, but erectile dysfunction’s not really something I’m prepared to discuss with my wee ones.
** If anyone needs me, I’ll be residing in our preheated oven until June.
** Despite what I might think (and it was definitely questionable this week), God does not give me more than I can handle.
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