** I am totally addicted to selling crap on virtual garage sale sites.
** Finding a CLEAN gas station bathroom is like finding a unicorn.
** Carpool duty should be immediately followed by wine.
** Eating with a jock cup on the table is, unfortunately, a regular occurrence in our house.
** It’s time to get cracking on Halloween costumes since my son insists on being a waffle this year.
** My son wants to be a WAFFLE for Halloween. WTF?!
** I have no doubt that my husband would fail sixth grade spelling. (Sorry, honey, but you would.)
** If it’s true that eating blueberries helps to improve your memory, I need to eat a whole damn farm.
** Poor Goatdog would starve if not for me.
** I’m constantly washing socks that don’t belong to any of my family members.
** A week is never longer than when you constantly think it’s a day ahead of what it actually is.
** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.
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