** Winter is officially “over” — and I’ll believe it when I see it.
** The Tooth Fairy’s gonna have to start leaving IOU’s if my twins don’t go to bed earlier at night.
** Just because you have a horn does not mean that you always have to toot it.
** There should be a treadmill right outside the dressing room at the start of swimsuit season.
** Bribing your kids do the household chores you hate to do is one of the perks of being a parent.
** It’s pretty sad when 45 degrees feels downright balmy outside.
** There apparently aren’t enough snacks in all the world to satisfy my children’s ravenous after school appetites.
** I think I might be nocturnal.
** After some of the tales I’ve heard lately, karma has certainly got its work cut out for it.
** I wish my kids spent as much time organizing their rooms as they do organizing the apps on their phones.
** An extra long red light does not mean that the car next to you wants to see you pluck out your nose hairs.
** You know you’re doing SOMETHING right if your dog winks at you.
** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.
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