Things I’ve Learned This Week

** It’s kind of disturbing to hear your nine year old sing about having someone blow his whistle.  (Yeah, thanks, Flo Rida.)

** I’m beyond thankful I’m not married to a politician.

** Fun-size 3 Musketeers are downright dangerous.

** My ass is gonna beep when I back up if I don’t amp up my workout routine again soon.

** Cake decorating with your kids is a whole lot more fun when it happens at somebody else’s house.

** Sweetest Day is apparently tomorrow, and you know what that means.  Absolutely nothing at all.

** The Tooth Fairy’s gonna have to turn to prostitution to pay for all the teeth these kids keep losing.

** I could really use some shots of Honey Boo Boo’s Go-Go Juice.

** Or a dull moment or two.

** Finding a petrified banana peel in your son’s room is not a very pleasant surprise.

** The back seat of my car looks like the aftermath of a raccoon party.

** Gravity can seriously suck it.

** Trying to trump last year’s Halloween costume has completely exhausted my last brain cell.

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.  (At least, I keep telling myself that anyway….)






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7 Responses to Things I’ve Learned This Week

  1. stacy says:

    Totally hate that I love the Flo Rida song & start singing them remember that’s also my 8 yr old in the back singing along… not appropriate i do not think… danggggg….

  2. dave broadstock says:

    I learned that I have been cheating myself by not reading your list for a while. You’ve still got it. You’re one of the funniest people online with a consistency that makes us know you’re twisted in all the right ways.

    • nuckingfutsmama says:

      Wow! That is a serious compliment — I LOVE being called “twisted in all the right ways”!!! Seriously, made my night! Thanks & hope to keep you reading! 🙂

  3. I hate that song! When my six year old daughter asked why she shouldn’t sing it, I just mumbled something about how maybe whistle wasn’t really a whistle and, hey, I think the toaster waffles are ready! Do you feel like extra syrup?!

    Anything to avoid *that* conversation.

    • nuckingfutsmama says:

      Seriously! I don’t know about you, but I am definitely not prepared to explain that whole “whistle” analogy just yet (or ever)…..

  4. Marta says:

    Lol I love that sweetest day is so completely and utterly a made up holiday and we all know it.

    Also I try to bring in as many groceries as humanly possibly in one trip while my husband takes two bags and goes back and forth 10 times.

  5. cyndy says:

    Cracking up at the ass beeping part! Hee hee I know that feeling.
    I’d be scared to take Honey Boo Boo’s juice….you wouldn’t want to turn into one of the Boo Boo Clan =O

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