You’d think past experience would’ve taught me not to trust my husband to cut my son’s hair. However, I must’ve had a momentary lapse in judgment over the weekend, for I allowed him to get the old clippers out once again. Call me kooky, but I guess I figured it couldn’t be THAT hard to screw up a buzz cut, could it? (Ok, stop giggling, people….)
So, my son plopped into a kitchen chair and placed his fragile little follicles in his papa’s rather unskilled hands. I was trying really hard to distract myself from the worry that was slowly building up in my stomach as the sound of the buzzing grew louder and louder. Finally, when I couldn’t take the suspense any longer, I allowed myself to take a quick peek at the so-called “work” in progress. And I nearly shrieked in horror as my eyes fell upon this epic hair fail:
Holy Edward Scissorhands, what the hell had he done to my baby??!! And unfortunately, things did not get much better from there. As my husband proceeded to shave off the rest of the hair from my son’s head, it became very apparent to me that an emergency intervention needed to take place and SOON. I seriously had to fight back the tears when I saw a bald stripe going across the top of my boy’s head and what appeared to be polka dots on the back of his noggin from all the uneven patches of hair. I told my husband that they needed to get their asses over to Jerry’s Barber Shop STAT to repair this historic wreck of a mess.
The stylist did the best she could with what she was given, and sadly, she pretty much had to shave the whole thing off. When my husband and my little man returned home from the cleanup effort, I had to choke back yet another round of hysterics. My poor child was now as bald as his father:
To this day, I am still trying to forgive my husband for making our son look like a poster child for St. Jude’s. Luckily, the great thing about hair is that it does, indeed, grow back. And fortunately, my little guy also happens to have a pretty darn cute mug to deflect from the Telly Savalas thing he’s got going on up north. In the meantime, though, my husband is soooooooo fired from any and all hair cutting duties….