High Fives To My Husband

Unlike the back-assward days of the 1950s, I, for one, do not always believe that Father knows best.  However, as much as it might pain me, I’ve gotta give credit where credit is due.  And sometimes, every once in a blue moon, my husband actually comes up with a semi-brilliant parenting strategy.

Like many households, getting our kids ready for bed at night seems like a never-ending process.  They suddenly get a burst of CRAZY second-wind energy that distracts them from every flippin’ thing that they’re supposed to be doing.  I often find myself on the verge of tears and/or hysteria while waiting for them to FINALLY put their damn pajamas on.  Seriously, paint could dry faster.

This has unfortunately become a recurring theme in our home that my husband had finally had enough of one evening last week.  In a moment of complete and utter frustration, he came up with a plan that I would’ve sworn would never in a million years work.  He informed the kids that they would receive “points” for quickly completing each task of their getting-ready-for-bed routine.  The faster they finished a task, the more points they’d each receive.  And much to my surprise, they fell for it hook, line, and sinker!  Even more amazing is that it never even occurred to them to ask what they’d get in return for earning all the points!  Uh, can you say “S-U-C-K-A-S“??!!

Ain’t no way on this earth I’m gonna give up the gig until absolutely necessary.  Believe you me, I’m totally milking my husband’s little game plan for all its worth.  Cause honestly, what’s the worst that can happen?  I end up having to pay them?  Whoopity do!  We all know darn well that bribery is every parent’s go-to tool…..

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10 Responses to High Fives To My Husband

  1. MamaBennie says:

    I really must try this when my children are old enough to understand what a points system is.

  2. Steph says:

    Wow! Way to go, Jeff!

  3. Nucking Futs Papa says:

    This is seriously full of awesomeness. I’ve placed absolutely ZERO value on the points, yet they clamor to win them (and they magically have the exact same number of points each – gots to keep the peace).

    Last illustration of this idea’s brilliance: it was 7:30pm and they wanted to go to a friends to play, I had a softball game to leave for at 8:30, I offered 5 points (more than ever before) if they were back home by 8:10 for bath time – 0 points if the clock read 8:11. Guess what time they ran back home by??? 8:09! BOO-FREAKIN-YEAH!

  4. MrsJennyk says:

    I can’t wait until mine are old enough to bribe! LOL

  5. Lu says:

    I think in the adult world it is called a pay check/salary.

  6. Stacy says:

    Ha! I love it- i got SO sick of yelling at the boys that a few weeks ago i got out a jar ; called it the “sad jar” & everytime i’ve had to tell them to do something more than say 1-2 times and i KNOW they hear me.. they owe ME money— yep I made $3.50 last week.. 🙂 they kept asking when they are getting it back … when i told them they weren’t it’s been pretty quiet around there….

  7. Carolyn says:

    Found you via Mom4Real! I’m loving your blog…you are an awesome writer and your sarcasm is identical to mine! Love it!

    I’m a new follower–hope you can stop by when you get the time.

    • nuckingfutsmama says:

      Hi Carolyn! Thanks so much for checking me out! Always happy to have new readers jumping on my crazy train! I’ll definitely pop over & check out your blog soon as well! 🙂

  8. Phil says:

    Bribery rules. Daily suckers were worth the end of diapers. And we got back to a normal bedtime with stickers. Lots of stickers.

    Mother and Father know best.

  9. John says:

    I can totally see your kids, a year from now, saying “I have eleven billion points, what can I get?” and you looking back “here’s a quarter.”

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