Category Archives: mom trying to stay sane blog

Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Mother’s Day should really be Mother’s Weekend. ** My brain is on MAJOR end-of-the-school-year overload. ** Warm weather just makes ya wanna eat ice cream.  (Or is that just me?) ** Some people should really reconsider making sex tapes. … Continue reading

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Somebody Stop Me Before I Get A Damn Puppy

I don’t know whether I’ve lost my mind or if my ovaries are bored, but lately, I’ve had both babies AND puppies on the brain.  Now I know that deep down, I don’t REALLY want to go back to that … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Cramps and mammograms are just two of the many perks (*ahem*)  of being a woman. ** I’d rather be a wrinkled mess than pull out an iron. ** Kids and husbands have very selective hearing. ** Getting in bed … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** I really couldn’t give a rat’s ass what Ryan Lochte would do. ** Diarrhea of the mouth is a dangerous thing. ** If you can’t laugh at yourself, you’re doing something wrong. ** I can rest easy now that … Continue reading

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Little League Angst

(Oh, but there is!!!!) _______________________________________________________ I don’t know about you, but I think little league baseball is one of the most painful sports to watch.  Not only is it like staring at drying paint cause it takes ten zillion years … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** My son isn’t afraid to run a song straight into the ground. ** Neither time nor cheese is on my side. ** If answering questions was a high-paying job, I’d be rolling in the benjamins. ** I feel naked without … Continue reading

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If It SMELLS Like Poo, It Probably IS Poo

_______________________________________________________________ Goatdog continues to amaze me with the ridiculously crazy things he chooses to eat. Lately, he’s munched on everything from aluminum foil to snotty Kleenex’s.  The more disgusting the item, the more appetizing it is to him.  And the … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** Spilled wine is WAY worse than spilled milk. ** The DMV is truly a vast sea of weirdness. ** Turning 29 again wasn’t so bad after all. ** We evidently need to start lining up in two’s to board … Continue reading

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You Say It’s Your Birthday? Well, It’s My Birthday, Too!

  It’s hard to believe that ten whole years have passed since I was squeezing my legs together like a freaking vice so my twins wouldn’t be born on my birthday.  Yep, call me crazy, but I did NOT wanna … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Learned This Week

** The longer you watch t.v. at night, the stupider the commercials get. ** North Korea needs a giant chill pill. ** I seriously hate sleepovers. ** It’s not so bad to be poked by a hot doctor. ** Rick … Continue reading

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